How do we mend a broken heart?
Break ups are painful. Heart~ache actually hurts.
Some feel it in their bellies...others feel it in their hearts. Some people can't eat...others want to eat all the time. Some can't think...and find it hard to do anything. Some have a hard time breathing and/or can't sleep at night.
We find ourselves asking "why...Why...WHY?" But we know, that even if we knew why...it wouldn't matter, it wouldn't help, it would still hurt.
So what can I tell you about practicing Buddhism and getting over a broken heart? A lot.
Do any of you remember why I first began this blog? Yes. Heart Break. I was very aware that this heart break was tapping into sadness that I had carried with me into this life...an underlying sadness that was always with me in some form or other, and had bloomed and blossomed with my broken heart.
My heart break was also filled with regret. I was constantly thinking "If only I hadn't...if only I could turn back time." So I was mad at myself, full of regret, and suffering...a perfect opportunity to turn poison into medicine.
Sensei says:
"The key to victory in our lives lies in how hard we struggle when we are in winter, how wisely we use that time, and how meaningfully we live each day confident that spring will definitely come."
from The Hope Filled Writings of Nichiren Daishonin. p. 107
I decided to chant two hours a day to permanently release my life from this torment once and for all. I determined that NEVER AGAIN would these feelings overcome me. and that this Daimoku campaign would change my life forever.
And it HAS. I am not the same person I was when I made this determination. I am stronger...I have peace of mind...I am on to bigger and better stuff. I am freed to actually live my true purpose in life - writing and encouraging people throughout the world. You see, this pain propelled me!
And I have to say ~ I appreciate my heart ache now. It was the catalyst for the Daimoku Campaign which ended up changing my life in so many positive ways. Poison into Medicine. THAT is the promise of the practice if we have the faith to ROAR like the lions we are!
Power Prayer to Mend a Broken Heart:
Life! I am determination to change this karma forever...I will be happy no matter what. I am tearing this sadness out by the roots. With every Daimoku I chant, I am strengthening my life at the core, so that NO MATTER WHAT I will be happy.
Happiness is my birthright.
I CLAIM my birthright and will get over this pain. I chant to replace my thoughts of this person with thoughts of appreciation for all the love I DO have in this life!
I chant for peace of mind.
I chant to transform all of this pain into positive energy for my life. And with this renewed energy, and positive proof of chanting Nam-myoho-renge-kyo ~ I will be able to inspire others.
Remember, it's not important to know all the WHYS. It is only important to make the determination to become happy in the depths of our beings. We are Buddhas revealing the depths of our own Buddhahood.
We must all realize that right now...at this moment when we are chanting...that we have the ultimate tool to make our lives happy forever. No Matter WHAT!!!
Sensei also instructs us to "...transform the moment-to-moment focus of our minds." (IBID)p. 68.
To change your focus you might want to:
Make a list of ALL THE THINGS YOU WILL NOT MISS about the person, and the situation. Keep it handy and read it often. And every time you find yourself thinking "Why me?" read the list.
I posted bulletin boards close to my altar with pictures of all of the people I love and who love me. It reminded me of all the love I DO have in my life. It still makes me happy just to look at it.
I also changed all the songs on my ipod that reminded me of my sadness and found new ones that made me dance in happiness.
When I really felt that I needed to express my heart I wrote in my journal about what I was feeling. That helped too.
This time of sadness will pass.
As Daisaku Ikeda says:
"Seen from the prespective of faith and Buddhism, everything has profound meaning. THere is no need whatsoever for us to vaccillate between elation and despair at each turn of the events. There is no such thing as a storm that will continue blowing and wreaking havoc without end. In the same way, there is no hardship that will continue forever....With the passage of time, it will definitely becomeclear that everything has unfolded in the best possible manner." (IBID p. 277)
Strengthen your faith more than ever.
And stay busy.
Do any of you have stories to share? Write me at chantforhappiness.com
