Suppose we have someone at work we don't get along with...or a family member that is giving us problems. What is the best way to handle this situation as a Buddhist?
Many of us have proven, time and again, that chanting for that person's happiness changes everything. Chanting for their happiness might not sound like something you want to do, or even feel capable of, but it works every single time, I promise.
Here are two examples:
The first time I tried this I hadn't been chanting all that long and I was selling advertising for the Bay Guardian Newspaper. This was before so much of the technology we have now. Ads were placed on the boards by hand, and it was all meticulously done. I sold a lot of advertising. And the person who trafficked my ads in production (I'll call her Katia) was always upset with me for some reason or other. It got to the point that she was really driving me crazy. So I sought guidance from one of my seniors in faith, who said I should chant for Katia's happiness, because my prayer would affect her state of life, and the energy between us would change.
I'll be honest, I thought it would be really difficult, if not impossible, to truly chant and desire this person's happiness. But the senior in faith told me to "fake it till you make it." In other words, start chanting for Katia's even if I couldn't really put my heart into it. She told me to picture Katia with a big smile on her face, and sooner or later my prayer for her happiness would become sincere.
This is exactly what happened. Within a very short period of time I found myself earnestly desiring happiness for Katia, and knowing in my heart that my chanting was going to have an effect.
About a month later, Katia announced that she was getting engaged and moving to Los Angeles. She was happy and so was I!
I realized that through this practice I was actually exercising my muscle of compassion. After that, chanting for anyone I was having problems with came much easier.
Another example was when I went to work for a larger company here in the Midwest. I could tell, that for no apparent reason, one of the employees really didn't like me, (I'll call her Sharon). She never said anything negative, and I didn't work with her very closely, but I could feel her hair standing on end when she saw me. So I decided to chant for her happiness every day for months.
Instead of leaving the company like Katia did, Sharon just totally changed her feelings for me and came to love and respect me. She served on several of my committees and spoke very highly of me. She and I put together a Holiday party for the senior staff based on kind words and love. We worked together happily for many years.
Throughout the years of my practice I have proven over and over that chanting for another person's happiness has a profound effect, and that I can GENERATE compassion by exercising my muscle of faith.
Is there anyone you have been resenting who you could chant for?
If you have a positive experience based on this (or any) post please let me know ~ all the readers would like to hear your experiences too.
