This life is an emotional journey for me. It always has been. I cured myself of depression through chanting, but I still feel emotions.
The more I practice Buddhism, the more I see that my ability to feel and release my emotions, not run from them, is a gift I can offer the world. And every morning and evening, I face the Gohonzon with all my heart...dedicating my life to proving the power of the mystic law through my life.
Sometimes it's hard to actually know what emotion I'm feeling. Strong emotions just overwhelm me...and I have to focus to see what they are. Lately, I am in extreme grief after the death of my son this summer, at the age of 22.
Those of you who read this blog know how hard I fought to keep him alive, but, in the end, the mental health system in this country totally failed him, and he took his own life...I say Schizophrenia killed him...because it's the truth.
So I am left with my mission...and I cannot change the past. How do I continue to show actual proof? How do I continue to encourage people? I think it is by living my absolute best life...by turning poison into medicine in some ways I don't even know right now.
Key #1
Make a Chanting Determination
Key #2
Make a Physical Determination
Key #3
FEEL the emotion!
For the moment, I'm focusing on making my body strong and healthy, focusing on business success...and building healthy momentum. Every day I do my best to chant two hours a day, and most days I make it...and some days I am just crying and chanting.
Today I was frantic with grief. I felt I must have failed my son. I'm his mother. I should have been able to protect him. Part of me knows that this is absurd...and that I did everything in my power to help him. Part of me believes I failed him.
So I took it to the Gohonzon and exercised my spiritual muscle. I sat and chanted, even though it was really, really hard today. I chanted until I saw Ben as the Buddha he is.
His life and death have meaning. Some has been revealed already. Some we have yet to learn.
Then I got on the treadmill and got my heart rate up...that always makes me feel better. Later I did EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) tapping and felt the emotion of anger and loss come pouring out of me. I let myself experience the depth of the emotion...and the anger ran its course and I felt peace.
The 3 Keys to Releasing Emotions really work!
I offer this to you on December 1st, when the holidays are happening here in the states, and emotions are magnified...
The best gift we can give others is our own happiness. It's the truth. The best gift I can give my family, my son Aaron, my sister Alison, and my father...is to go through my grief and get to the other side...and ultimately turn poison into medicine.
The more I practice Buddhism, the more I see that my ability to feel and release my emotions, not run from them, is a gift I can offer the world. And every morning and evening, I face the Gohonzon with all my heart...dedicating my life to proving the power of the mystic law through my life.
Sometimes it's hard to actually know what emotion I'm feeling. Strong emotions just overwhelm me...and I have to focus to see what they are. Lately, I am in extreme grief after the death of my son this summer, at the age of 22.
Those of you who read this blog know how hard I fought to keep him alive, but, in the end, the mental health system in this country totally failed him, and he took his own life...I say Schizophrenia killed him...because it's the truth.
So I am left with my mission...and I cannot change the past. How do I continue to show actual proof? How do I continue to encourage people? I think it is by living my absolute best life...by turning poison into medicine in some ways I don't even know right now.
Key #1
Make a Chanting Determination
Key #2
Make a Physical Determination
Key #3
FEEL the emotion!
For the moment, I'm focusing on making my body strong and healthy, focusing on business success...and building healthy momentum. Every day I do my best to chant two hours a day, and most days I make it...and some days I am just crying and chanting.
Today I was frantic with grief. I felt I must have failed my son. I'm his mother. I should have been able to protect him. Part of me knows that this is absurd...and that I did everything in my power to help him. Part of me believes I failed him.
So I took it to the Gohonzon and exercised my spiritual muscle. I sat and chanted, even though it was really, really hard today. I chanted until I saw Ben as the Buddha he is.
His life and death have meaning. Some has been revealed already. Some we have yet to learn.
Then I got on the treadmill and got my heart rate up...that always makes me feel better. Later I did EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) tapping and felt the emotion of anger and loss come pouring out of me. I let myself experience the depth of the emotion...and the anger ran its course and I felt peace.
The 3 Keys to Releasing Emotions really work!
I offer this to you on December 1st, when the holidays are happening here in the states, and emotions are magnified...
The best gift we can give others is our own happiness. It's the truth. The best gift I can give my family, my son Aaron, my sister Alison, and my father...is to go through my grief and get to the other side...and ultimately turn poison into medicine.