How to get rid of despair - 16 tips and ideas to get you there!

This was one of the most popular posts this year. I thought some of the newer readers might appreciate reading it:

Here's a question I received from a reader, and the answer follows:

Question:

"How are you doing? I read your blog everyday and it makes me soo encouraged.

Lately I haven't been able to chant much due to some or the other reason (even though I try hard to take out time)

and now after almost 4 days of not doing regular gongyo and daimoku, today I am sitting in my office feeling completely lost and low and negative and depressed.

Have been crying sitting at my seat. Like everyones shooting at my weaknesses and trying to let me down.

I know these are the devilish functions working, but I'm not able to gather up the courage to stand up and chant again.

Please share with me anything you like. I've never felt so low in life.

All of a sudden I see a problem everywhere, in everyone, in every aspect of my life be it relationship, work, health ..everything..

Thank you in advance. You are truly an inspiration for many people!!"

Dear friend! 

You are just out of rhythm, and you can so easily get back into it! Here are a few words of encouragement from my heart. First of all, whether you believe it or not we have all been there! We have all been immersed in times where everything around us is darkness and there seems to be no light no matter where you turn. It goes without saying that the sooner you can start doing gongyo twice a day, the sooner things will get better, and I AM SURE that things WILL GET BETTER! You have the ultimate tool for happiness...sometimes it gets very hard to pick it up and use it. I know. We all know! I hope this post helps! 

Here are 16 ideas and tips to pull you through:

1.

There are a few quotes I've embedded in my life: 

"Suffer what there is to suffer and enjoy what there is to enjoy, and continue chanting Nam Myoho Renge Kyo no matter what happens...then you will experience boundless joy from the law."

From Happiness in This World

Sometimes I interpret this as "It's all right to cry" and I stop resisting feeling bad and just allow myself to cry and release the feelings. 

Another is 

"Winter always turns to Spring"

And it does, doesn't it? Every single year! Sometimes it seems to take longer! But the seasons DO change! 

One of my favorite quotes from Daisaku Ikeda (from the book Learning from the writings. The Hope-Filled Teachings of Nichiren Daishonin. Page 277:

"Seen from the perspective of Buddhism, 

everything has profound meaning. 

There is no need whatsoever to vacillate between elation and despair at each turn of events. 

There is no such thing as a storm that will 

continue blowing and wreaking havoc without end. 

In the same way, there is no hardship that will continue forever. There are clear days and there are rainy days. If we are swayed by our environment, rejoicing one moment and despairing the next amid ever-changing circumstances, then we will not be able to accomplish a true revolution in our state of life.

The important thing is to always believe in the mystic law and to enter the powerful orbit of faith, practice and study. Entering the orbit - the orbit of human revolution and of  changing our karma - is the way to construct a life of good fortune and happiness that will endure throughout eternity. No matter what happens, we will enjoy the unerring protection of the Gohonzon. Instead of drawing conclusions about the world of faith from a superficial viewpoint, we need to calmly discern the true reality and significance of things and keep pressing forward. 

With the passage of time, it will definitely become clear that everything has unfolded in the best possible manner." 

2. 

When I feel despair ~

I write. I write all the sadness out. Sometimes I write to my Mom who, as some of you know, died almost 3 years ago. I just write what I am feeling and it makes me feel better. 

3. 

I take plenty of Vitamin D. For me, sometimes I just need more Vitamin D. 

Also drink a LOT of water! 

4. 
Encourage someone else! Give a stranger a Nam Myoho Renge Kyo card. Talk to someone you know about past benefits you've had. Doing this will remind you of how you've broken through in the past, and you'll gain more hope for the present. 

5.
Take a bath with salt in it...the more salt the better! 

6. 

Clean your Butsudan and altar area. The altar in your home is a reflection of your own life. When you treat it with respect, your environment and all the people in it treat you with respect. If you do not yet have a Gohonzon you can still set up an altar where you chant with offerings to your life...fruit, water, a plant, candles, and incense if you like. 

7. 

Call a true friend. And if you don't have one, put that on your chanting list as something you are chanting for...I did this. I have many true friends now, and chanted for friends for quite some time. 

8. 

As soon as you can, get back in front of the altar to chant. And don't be afraid to cry in front of the Gohonzon or while you are chanting. heck, for the first couple of years I cried all the time when I chanted. It was as if my life had to release years and years of  emotion. 

9. 

Move your body. Go for a walk! Get your energy and your blood flowing! 

10.

Study~

Read the Gosho or President Ikeda's writings! When you read these things - read them with your life. Choose a phrase or a passage and chant to realize its deeper meaning with your life. Chant to share the heart of Daisaku Ikeda. He has a heart beating with the fervent drum of Kosen Rufu. WHen your heart shares this reason it will push feelings of despair away! 

11. 

Ask someone to chant with you!

Get support! 

12. Change what you are saying to yourself in your mind. If your constant refrain is "Why me? How can this be happening to me again." it is important to just change that thought. Replace it with a more positive thought. You choose that thought. How about "Things are getting better and better for me, I just know it...sometimes it is hard to see, but I am definitely on my way!" or "Don't give up (insert your name) it's always darkest before the dawn!" 

13. Breathe deeply. When we are low we tend to breathe in a really shallow way, and it adds to our depression to breathe this way. Sit down and focus on your breathing. Fill your body with air. Picture that air as a bright light coming down from the top of your head...slowly moving down your body as your grey depressive mood seeps out your fingers and toes. Try this. It really does work! 

14. Smile! Go look at yourself in the mirror and smile. Look in your eyes and smile. Did you know it is almost impossible to be depressed when you are smiling?

15. Look up! That's right, look up. Tony Robbins, the inspirational success coach and mentor says that looking down has been proven to actually bring people down, while looking up has the opposite effect. 

16. When you are chanting - direct your thoughts like this:
"Gohonzon (my life itself!) Now is the time for me to rise from these emotions so I can show actual proof of the power of this law. NOW is the time for me to vanquish these feelings of hopelessness. I will NO LONGER allow these feelings to run my life. NOW I CHOOSE TO BE HAPPY! I am a precious child of the Buddha, I will not stand for these feelings anymore. I vow to win in all aspects of my life. I vow to win!" 

All will be well. All will be well. All will be well. 

You will one day be encouraging others. And you will have sooooo much compassion!! 

I am thinking of you and chanting for you, and for all! 

Strength

"The stronger the oppression from without, 
the stronger one's determination
to summon forth one's inner resources to fight against it ~
That is the spirit of youth" 

Daisaku Ikeda, 
For Today and Tomorrow
September 2nd. 

Yes, strength IS the spirit of youth...but sometimes youth don't have the strength to go on. 

Today at the Illinois Area Activity Center I was chanting for all youth to have strength. One of my beautiful young women...my sweet songbird is in the hospital. I was chanting with her mother for her family, for her heart, for her strength. Her name is Shazara and she is only seventeen. And being seventeen is just as difficult now as it was when I was young. It is just as easy to be hurt. And young people everywhere are all lashing out in their own hurt and anger. Please join me in my prayer for my beautiful songbird. I will post her brilliant story of victory here in time. Right now I am focusing my prayer. 


Here is another of my favorite quotes for you: 

From Discussions on Youth, page 306 by Daisaku Ikeda:

"There are many times our prayers seem to take ages to be fulfilled, or when they remain unrealized despite the most impassioned chanting of Nam Myoho Renge Kyo. But the important thing to remember is to keep chanting until the ARE answered. Our continued chanting gives us the chance to take a good hard look at ourselves, leading to positive changes on our daily lives. It's like work ~ you get a job, and go to work but you don't get paid on the first day. Or it's like gardening ~ you plant a sapling and water it every day, but it still takes a long time for it to grow into a tall tree...all good things come from continual, repeated efforts." 

Enjoy your wonderful day and chant to strengthen your faith! Chant to show such brilliant actual proof that people will be appearing all around you who want you to share this Buddhism with them!!!! 

So, you may ask...how DO I get rid of anger...?

Well, if you've been reading this blog for while you know there is absolutely one fool proof way. It may not be the only way, but it is the one way I know for sure works 100% of the time. 

Start by continuing to build your faith stronger and stronger and stronger.

How do we do that? 

Chant every day - twice a day, morning and evening, morning and evening, morning and evening. 
This will give you momentum. This will help you become stronger and stronger. 

What do I mean by become stronger and stronger? Raising your life condition. When our life conditions are strong, things that normally might bother us do not bother us anymore...we are able to release anger...take a deep breath and relax. 

Chant to raise your life condition and experience life as the Buddha YOU ARE. We are all Buddhas! We just sometimes don't see it...but we can. Our continued devotion to our everyday practice. 

Chant to raise your life condition! 

Chant to deepen your faith!

Chant for the happiness of the person you are angry at - or chant to release them from your life and your anger. You can do it. !!

Great Quote about Anger

Isn't this the truth? 

But why is it so? Really? 

The truth is that the belief that we are all interconnected is true...we all are part of the web of life. When we move, everything moves around us...when we feel anger and hold on to it we project anger out into the universe...and make a cause for more anger and unhappiness in our lives. It does not help us. 

Releasing and getting rid of anger is forgiveness. 

I know, many religions talk about forgiveness. I like to think about it as for-giveness. 

Giving it forth. 

It doesn't mean that whatever the person did is all right. It just means that we are not connecting ourselves to the negative energy surrounding it. We are free. 

We are the Buddhas of Absolute Freedom. 

It is each of ours to choose...do we wish to hang onto anger and drink the poison of our attachment to the hurt...or are we ready to let it go and move on...release ourselves from the situation...grow and become stronger...more free...more everything good! 

How to have a MAGNIFICENT LIFE by Roaring Like a LION!

Do you realize how strong we all are? All of us who chant Daimoku (Nam Myoho Renge Kyo) have the power to ROAR LIKE LIONS and create the lives of our dreams! 
All we have to do is realize it, and when we chant...demand results from our own life. 
That's right. When we chant we are connecting with our own life, so we are not asking anyone or anything for "favors". 
No, we are connecting with our highest life power...that of the entire life and power of the whole universe. Nam Myoho Renge Kyo is the name of the rhythm of life itself. It is already inside you. 
Please chant with the knowledge that Nam Myoho REnge Kyo is YOUR LIFE ITSELF! And claim your birthright! Claim your power! Don't settle for a life of suffering. 

"Nam Myoho Renge Kyo is like the roar of a lion, what sickness can therefore be an obstacle?"

Sickness means any problem, and challenge, any trouble from illness to relationships, to depression...ANYTHING. Nam Myoho Renge Kyo...and YOUR chanting can BREAK THROUGH anything. You just have to dig deep and realize Nam Myoho RENge Kyo is your life itself, and chant with conviction. 

You are an honorable Buddha - you deserve the absolute best. 

Chant Nam Myoho Renge Kyo with happiness and conviction. Write down with pen and paper what you want for your life. 
Chant to see the kind of benefit that will strengthen your faith. 
Chant to strengthen your faith! When you chant with the faith that YOU KNOW your prayers will have an impact - they will! 

Chanting takes courage! You can do it! You can make any change you want to see for yourself and others. 

Below is a post from earlier this summer. I thought you might want to read it again: 

Last night the evil twin in my head reappeared with thoughts that were tailor made to bring me down! I swear! No one can bring me down faster than those negative thoughts in my head. 
I know you know what I mean! 

We all have these negative thoughts! We are all familiar with those negative thoughts in our own brains!

We all have thoughts that can lead us into negative places. Mine tempt me to feel afraid for no good reason. They nudge me to be sad when I have nothing to be sad about. But they are so familiar...it's almost like a well worn groove in my brain. I think these thoughts and I feel my spirits sinking. 

I am at a great place in my life in all ways. I'm healthy, happy, have great relationships, enjoy my job, and I'm moving forward with my book and the other really cool things I'm looking forward to offering you! I'm helping people to learn Gongyo and tonight there is going to be a rocking Buddhist meeting here at my house. OF COURSE these thoughts would reappear. These are the obstacles we call sansho shima, forces that work to hold us back! They can only defeat us if we fail to see them as the obstacles they are...and give them more power by believing them! 

For me, when they occur, it is one more time to roar like a lion!

So this morning I did my walk in the Chicago area's unbelievably gorgeous weather (I love the heat!) and came back and chanted. 

I chanted Nam Myoho Renge Kyo and told the depths of my life NO WAY !!!! No thoughts are going to bring this Buddha Down! Get out of my head!!!! I am determined to be happy in every way so that I can lead my friends who read this blog, and the members of my district, and everyone else I meet or have yet to meet, to happiness! I am the happiness master! No tiny little nasty thoughts are going to get in my way!!! Roooooaaaaaaarrrrrr!!!!! 

And now I feel GREAT!!!

The universe is yours to command! 
What will you stand up for today!
Please share with me so I can use your wonderful words and experiences for my book!

Repost of an incredible Experience!

Julia Landis...Musician...Healer....Yoga Master...
and now....Nichiren Buddhist!!!
What follows is Julia's experience, written by her. I'll throw in a few annotations as well. Just let me say to begin, that Julia was a special radiant and wonderful friend from the moment we met many years ago. Her Yoga classes transported me. No other teacher compares. Since she is already so incredibly spiritual, once she decided to embrace this practice she "GOT" it in a way that is always teaching me...and we have been growing and evolving and creating our wonderful lives ever since! I learn so much from her!

Kelly's Island Ohio...where this story takes place..

Dear readers (from Julia),

some of you may have read Jamie's post about me last summer. After 13 years of contemplating chanting NMHRK I finally took the big plunge last fall after I realized I had nothing left to lose. After visiting with Jamie on Kelley's Island in Ohio and seeing the transformation of her relationship with her husband and experiencing their warm friendship in the midst of their impending separation I was truly amazed. There was simply an ease and happiness I could feel in being with them, which was a relief to me for many reasons, but most acutely, because I was really suffering: I was experiencing severe challenges to my health, far worse than anything I could have imagined. I had MRSA type wounds on my foot that refused to heal. It was a nightmare in the humid midwestern summer to try and enjoy being a tourist while the band-aids and ointment repeatedly slid off and I was left in searing pain and fear of further infection. I also had developed chronic giardiasis and related intestinal syndromes. Let's say I was not a "happy camper." Please scroll down...

I remember not talking with Julia much about chanting at the beginning of the visit. I let my life speak for me. Julia could see the physical transformation I'd had since I last saw her ...with the loss of 70 pounds and the new outlook on life...I look much younger. Outside at the lake I remember telling her something about my relationship with Paul, and she said "I want to try it."

I asked Jamie if she would chant with me one afternoon while we were alone at a picnic area overlooking Lake Eerie. I was so weak I asked if I could chant lying down on the picnic table. Jamie gently recommended that I at least try sitting up, to feel the energy in my body... 

Although my husband was opposed to the practice--and had been for over a decade-- I was determined this time not to let anything stand in my way. I'll never forget the first time I chanted with Jamie for more than a few minutes, staring out at the calm surface of Lake Eerie-- my first Gohonzon!--from beneath a picnic shelter accompanied by the chatter of newly hatched swallows nesting above us. I was blown away, so to speak, when Jamie's son Ben, a top athelete, stood behind us and joined us in chanting. I got the goose bumps as I felt the generations of Buddhas voices like a soft wind under my broken wings, lifting me towards the light.

 Here are the birds Julia's talking about

After I returned home, many obstacles arose to my practicing, but I let nothing stop me. At first I only chanted a couple of minutes a day and got out of breath and hoarse. (Julia was incredibly weak and sick when she started chanting - her transformation has been amazing) I created an altar and began to thirst for the experience of chanting. Jamie expressed so much support, making herself available in ways no other friend or helper would ever have been able to... I now realize that she was excited for me and knew about the benefits that lay in store for me. I read the copy of "On Attaining Buddhahood in this Lifetime" she had given me as a gift and began to hear Daisaku Ikeda's loving and powerful words reverberating in me when I chanted. I believe at this point I began to connect with the spirit of Nichiren Daishonin, the Buddha of our age who first chanted Nam Myoho Renge kyo and unlocked the mysteries of the Lotus sutra for all of us living in this age. Nichiren wrote... "With this teaching  all the teachings advocated by [earlier Buddhist teachers] will be like stars after sunrise..." I began to feel joy in my chanting and worked my way up to chanting an hour a day. At this point I discovered (through amazing synchronicities involving my husband and public radio) the herbs I needed to treat the MRSA. It took months and several approaches, but by now you've guessed it: the wounds have closed and are healing

nicely. 

With each passing week the benefits mounted. A doctor who'd been treating me in a half hearted always busy way began to take a real interest in me and began really helping me. Through his increased vigillance I was able to get an MRI which has led me, again through synchronicities to the most wonderful physical therpist I could have ever imagined. I am getting full physical healing including pilates and cranio-sacral therapy now and... it's all covered by my insurance. I also have begun receiving lucid dreams guiding me further along in my healing and I began my own blog about my experience. As Jamie has put it, I've gone from an experience of dying to an experience of really LIVING. Of feeling alive and cherishing each moment of my life, no matter what it brings.

It has been so exciting to share each benefit and each new challenge with Jamie, knowing that she fully understands both the nature of suffering and the emergence of strength and capacity that come with this practice and can stand beside me in either kind of state. With her encouragement, I was able to overcome many obstacles and learn to chant Gongyo; this year on New Year's day I received my Gohonzon, the mandala Nichiren Daishonin personally inscribed for his disciples (us!) some seven hundered years ago.

Having practiced many forms of meditation and yoga over the past twenty years, I was amazed to experience the blessing of chanting NMHRK with my eyes open and fixed on the character which means "MYO" on the Gohonzon. Minutes slip away in states of happiness, peace, transcendance that are worthy of MYO's immeasurable meanings chiefly characterized by the simple definitions, "to open" to "rejuvenate" and "fully endow."

I made a determination, on the eve of receiving my Gohonzon that each time I would look upon it I would be filled with reverence for it and for my life, of which it is a mirror. And I am. I can never adequately thank Jamie for sticking with me for the 12 or so years it took me to "open" up my life to my full potential and cultivate the capacity and the bravery to live fully and embrace my innate Buddhahood. I am learning the exquisite feeling of deep worthiness, worthiness of love, healing and real joy. I am beginning to praise my life.

Nam Myoho Renge Kyo!

Julia has changed in so many ways since she began chanting Nam Myoho Renge Kyo. Her voice...her health...her bright eyes...and most of all...Julia knows...beyond a shadow of a doubt...that she can accomplish every happiness she desires. She knows with a knowing that is beyond intellectual, that the ONLY way to accomplish her desires is to wholeheartedly EMBRACE them!  She knows YOU MUST chant for what your heart desires...you Can't tamp it down. And you will either get what you are chanting for...or something better...or your desires will change and so will your suffering. She is a living Buddha...inspiring people with her incredible life! We've only just begun! So much more to create...chant for...embrace...appreciate!!! She knows she has found the key to every happiness...and what could be better than that!!!! I love you Julia! I love you readers! May each of you be soooo inspired by beautiful Julia!!!!