(These are the clouds above me as I sit to write on my patio at 6:00 am this morning)
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Happiness doesn’t exist
on the far side of distant mountains.
It is within you, yourself.
Not you, however, sitting in idle passivity.
It is to be found
in the vibrant dynamism of your own life
as you struggle to challenge and overcome
one obstacle after another,
as you clamber up a perilous ridge
in pursuit of that which lies beyond.
Daisaku Ikeda
Yes!
As I've been observing and swimming in this process of feeling and experiencing grief, and gathering the insight and tools to keep moving up the mountain Daisaku Ikeda describes above, I have realized something.
The thoughts of "I wish I had ___________. Or I wish I hadn't_____________." Or "If only I had___________."
are the ones that torment me the most. These are the thoughts that sometimes wake me up at night, or "attack" me at odd times. And they cause great suffering.
And yesterday, when I went to my study meeting I realized those thoughts of regret are just fundamental darkness.
Fundamental darkness tries to trip us up in our practice...It can appear as these thoughts of regret, these thoughts that make us think we are not the Buddhas that we are. These thoughts can be insidious and defeat us, OR once recognized and challenged, they can serve to strengthen our faith, and strengthen the protective forces of the universe.
And we all know that once we recognize fundamental darkness for what it is - THEN we have the power to face and challenge it!
So, I am going to challenge this fundamental darkness, (the regret that surfaces and attacks me), the same way I challenged and overcame depression. I am going to shout it out of my life while I am chanting. You may remember when I was challenging depression I chanted "I don't CARE how many times you come back to me depression. I recognize you for what you are. I will win over you. I will root you from my life. I will root this depression out of my life NOW...no matter how many times you return!" And I did totally root that depression from my life.
It will be the same with the fundamental darkness of this regret. We can win over it, and we can help others to do the same.
Do you have a thought that resurfaces and causes you to suffer? You are the Buddha, the great Buddha! You can challenge that thought too, and move on to scale the next mountain.
The next time that thought arises, or even before it arises, challenge it in front of the Gohonzon.
PowerPrayer to
Vanquish a Recurring Regret
PowerPrayers are meant to be read before chanting to fuel our determination!
By Jamie Lee Silver of chantforhappiness.com
"Hello regret!
Hello thought and emotion!
I know you for what you are,
fundamental darkness meant to discourage me.
NOT THIS TIME!
NOT TODAY!
I see you for what you are and I replace you with thoughts that make me happy, not sad.
I replace you with appreciation.
I am rising in my Buddha power
as I chant these words.
I now root out the pain of this thought forever,
I AM WINNING
Right Now!
And I will be stronger than ever.
Right now,
As I am chanting, my life is getting stronger.
I am recognizing this devilish function
and I am winning over it.
Pain of this thought ~ Be Gone!
Also, I have to tell you how much I am appreciating your letters. You can write me at Jamie Lee Silver 17W702 Butterfield #104, Oakbrook Terrace, IL 60181