Thriving, not Surviving

OK, I have successfully made it through one of life's greatest transitions...launching my precious boys into the world. As of last weekend, Aaron is at the University of Illinois, and Ben is at Miami of Ohio more than four hours away.
You know....someone once said to me, that once you have a child it is like your heart is permanently walking around outside your body ~ and I know this to be true. 
Right now my heart is launched in two different campuses. And I can't hover and control everything. 
No, at this point I have to trust that the years of raising them to chant for their own lives, and the continual Daimoku that I am chanting,  is just what they need to continue winning in life.
I love what Preseident Ikeda says about winning. It is not that winning is NEVER LOSING. WINNING MEANS NEVER BEING DEFEATED NO MATTER WHAT. 
We are human after all, aren't we?
Look at Ben, he's figuring everything out. He has a running scholarship he earned with his own hard work...and most people just wouldn't even believe what he puts himself through on a daily basis. When he's in good running shape (i.e. not injured) he pushes himself running in ways I can't even imagine. When he's injured (which is, mysteriously, and annoyingly...frequent) he pushes himself even harder...working in the gym for three hours or more to keep his cardio up for when he CAN run again.
Right now there is a question as to whether he'll be able to run this semester or not...we shall see. 
During his first week at college he met with many department heads on campus to help decide what major he wants to pursue.
On the day I moved him into his dorm,  I presented him with a tiny altar for his Omamori Gohonzon, anew book and beads set, Discussions on Youth by Daisaku Ikeda, and a gorgeous new bell. He'd received his Omamori Gohonzon earlier this summer. I know he is equipped now for success. I know he knows where he can turn when faced with challenges.  I can only hope that he has endless days of sunshine and glory...but life isn't always like that. But knowing that he is ready....well, as his Mom...I can breathe...I am happy.
And Aaron...he is handling what they call "Secondaries" for Medical school....I think that's what they call this phase of the application process. Who knows where he will be this time next year/ In the meantime, he's got an apartment he just fixed up and made wonderful...and all his friends around him everywhere. He's all set to lead his cross country club to victory at U of I, and succeed in his own life. I still am amazed at the thought of him last year...chanting in his conservative yet cool (they don't do hazing) fraternity.
And me, well, miraculously, my life is going on, even opening up. New and exciting people are coming into my life and showing me worlds of interesting, exciting, fun adventures. I am experiencing my own life as the rich, deep, passionate self I am. My true friends are more of a treasure than ever. I am appreciating every moment at a time I could be falling apart. For the past 20 years I have been responsible for raising these two bright sparks into their own power and happiness...and now they are launching into the world....not quite on their own...but needing me in a different way. So my life MUST expand and welcome new energy. Aaaaahhhh. It is wonderful :) Nam Myoho Renge Kyo friends.


If I can be this happy at this moment, anything is possible for you. I am living the life of my dreams You can too. Every single Nam Myoho Renge Kyo I have chanted is blossoming into my life right now. Whatever you're facing, Nam Myoho Renge Kyo is MUCH more powerful than any problem or challenge you have.   Don't take MY word for it though! Prove the power of the universe in your life! You are one of the lucky ones. You KNOW about Nam Myoho Renge Kyo and can use it! Chant to acheive your desires beyond your wildest dreams! Fortunate YOU!!!!!

An Experience from my New friend in Australia! So inspiring!

This is from my new friend Nathan. Read it and be inspired by HOW FAST chanting Daimoku can impact your life. And remember, sometimes we go through the lows so that they can bring us to a much more incredible HIGH!!!

I discovered Daishonin Buddhsim through my councillor, I had a problem problems with my life, anger, addiction, hurting the ones I love most emotionally, mentally. About four weeks ago, my beautiful, loving, caring, wonderful wife left me because of these problems I had, all she wanted is for me to respect her, treat her with the love and care she has always showed me. But I just blew it off all the time, saying that I can fix myself, I don't need a councillor or any help, OMG was I wrong!!! What I didn't realize was that I did need help, and bad, so about three days ago I went to see my councillor, my wife came along to support me, to make a long story short, the things she said to the councillor about the way she feels and that she was happier in the past few weeks then when she was with me shocked my system drastically, I had been extremely depressed over the past few weeks from my wife leaving me but those few things she pointed out to the councillor hurt me more then any pain I ever felt, it was like a knife to the heart. My wife left the session early, and I stayed behind, let me add I'm South African and my wife is Australian, so I was here on a sponsorship from my wife, when she left mr, she withdrew her sponsorship and that gave me twenty eight days to stay in the country. So because of thy my councillor suggested I try Nichiren Daishonin Buddhism out, I thought to myself heck what so I have to lose, I've lost everything already. So we started to practice chanting, (Nam- myoho-renge-kyo) after the first five minutes I started to get the hang of it, after ten minutes I felt this amazing warmth insid of me, I felt relaxed, like the sadness had left my mind, I felt energized, peaceful. That afternoon I was walking through Melbourne city, and the thought popped in my head. So I stopped at the best florist in the city, and bought my gorgeous wife here favorite flowers (Lillie's) I went passed her parents place and I ran the bell, no answer, I rang again, no answer, so I rang a friend that lives in the complex, to my surprise he was home, and trust me he's never home. He opened and I sat on the stairs in front of her place, about 30 min she came down the stairs as two lovely ladies were entering the stairwell, she was surprised as heck, I gave her the flowers and a card, she offered me a lift on the way to one of her dancing classes she teaches at, we got to talking and when I left her on my way to the train station she hugged me, kissed me and told me she loves me. Gosh I felt amazing!! For the first time in weeks. I felt something other then pain and heart ache. 

So that night I got home, had dinner and went to my room, I started chanting loud and proud with all my heart thinking how much I would love my wife to give me another chance so that I could show her that I can change and I can be that man she fell in love with, I won't make another empty promise to her again, I did this for the next day aswell morning and evening, then this morning 13/08/2011 I went to work and I waited outside my office for 2 hours waiting for my boss to arrive, while I was waiting I started chanting in the work van, again loud and proud, for about thirty minutes. By then I realized my boss wasn't coming so I thought let me go take a walk in the city, I got near my parents inlaw's place, I decided To ask my wonderful mother inlaw if she'd like to go for coffee with me, she came down and told me that they were cleaning the carpets, so we sat down and had a long talk ( about an hour and a half) then my wife arrived from teaching, I asked her if she wanted to grab a coffee or something, she said YES!! so we went into the city and had a coffee, we ended up spending the entire day together, holding hands, kissing, hugging, you know.... What I'm trying to say is that even after three days of chanting Nam-Myoho-Renge-kyo my life started to change, I've started to feel hope again happiness, compassion, I feel fantastic!!! All I can say is that I believe and I'm no where near gonna give up, Nichiren Daishonin Buddhism is in me and is here to stay. I wanna thank you for your blog it has inspired me to never give up on my happiness, on my wife, on my life. Thank you with my heart of hearts thank you to you and my new mentor Nichiren Daishonin for giving me this wonderful and joyful gift of faith and enlightenment. THANK YOU

What do you chant about...when you are really happy?

This can be a real challenge...no kidding. How do you chant when you are blissfully happy. 
Well, I'll tell you this is one good place to be in.


 Congratulations on being blissfully happy!!!!


And the answer is amazingly simple and obvious...of course....CHANT IN APPRECIATION!!! Say thank you UNIVERSE! Thank you life itself! Thank you MY LIFE! Thank you soooo much. Thank you Daisaku Ikeda...and sincerely, really, thank yourself. Your benefits and happiness have come about because of all the good causes you have made in chanting, in shakubuku and in life. 


Praise your life! Honor your Life! Enjoy every single Nam Myoho Renge Kyo you chant. Your happiness will bring even more happiness! Chant to experience a deeper, richer, higher level of happiness than you ever have before! What a worthy prayer ~ you Buddha YOU!!!! Enjoy! 

Paul McCartney last night ~ absolutely AGELESS!!!

I went to see Paul McCartney last night. He gave an amazing performance.  


You know 69 is not old any longer! Remember when the song "When I'm 64" came out? Oh my goodness...at that time 64 sounded absolutely ancient. And now...we have Paul McCartney having the time of his life performing three hour shows in stadiums...and looking and sounding great at 69!


I'm relaxing tonight after a string of exciting and fun days and nights, and I put on the movie "You can Heal Your Life" by Louise Hay. Louise says "I just entered my 8th decade and I've decided that this will be my best decade EVER! Whatever decade you are in - declare it to be your best EVER!" OK Louise, you amazing and smart and wonderful woman. I declare this decade to be my best ever!!!! I KNOW I look younger than I did ten years ago! Nam Myoho Renge Kyo works!!!!

Dearest Friends and Brothers

Here are my boys Aaron and Ben. This is a golden moment in a wonderful time. Aaron is completing applications for Med School, and Ben is about to enter his first year at Miami of Ohio on a scholarship for running. Aaron and Ben are closer than any brothers I have ever seen. 


When they were little Buddha boys, and even before they were born, I made the determination that there would be no fighting in my house EVER. And I have a vivid memory of a time just after we moved from San Francisco to Chicago in 1999. Ben was 5, Aaron was 8. And I heard a scuffle in the other room. It wasn't severe by most people's standards but it was enough for me to put my Buddha foot down! 
I called them both in front of the Gohonzon and said we are going to chant for 5 minutes. We will chant to love our brother and never fight again. "Okay Mommy" they said and we all chanted together. 
They never fought again. 
Such is the power of the mystic law. 
It is that deep. 
They are incredibly close. 
I had one other rule. "Stop Means Stop." When someone is doing something the other doesn't like...they only have to say stop one time. This actually worked. Seriously. 
And I have heard other mothers say wistfully "If only I had a moment during the day when my boys weren't fighting." and I have seen little boys hurt each other on purpose while in stores or on the street with their mother....and the mother lets it happen because she doesn't think she can stop it. And my heart swells with appreciation for this practice. 
How wonderful to have a practice that solves real life problems!!!!
Nam Myoho Renge Kyo!!! 

About Setting Deadlines for results...

I received a note from a reader about deadlines. They were wondering what to do when the deadline has passed, but the result has not happened. What does this mean...and what do you do next.

Since Kate is here I am going to ask her to address this:

We set deadlines to motivate OURSELVES into action. A deadline is not for the universe to respond to us. We chant. We take action. The deadline comes. We either win or we don't. If we don't we pick ourselves right up again and redetermine. The goal is to never be defeated. Sensei always says "To win in life is to never be defeated." That does not mean that we will never fail. It's our spirit that matters. The battle we fight is not with the universe. It's with our inner demons...the ones that say things like "obviously chanting doesn't work because I did not get my dream by my deadline...or...maybe I should have a different goal...maybe I wasn't MEANT to have that thing!....or what am I doing wrong? Maybe I wasn't chanting the RIGHT way!" It is at that juncture that we must recognize the opportunity to deepen our faith and our understanding of the profundity of Buddhism. ANYTHING that DRAINS OUR LIFE FORCE is the negative function. Any inner voice that causes us doubt and hopelessness IS the negative function. Once we decide we will win no matter what ~ we need only to continue. We've already won. The battle is with the negative function within. 
Ultimately, deadlines are irrelevant. Set them if you need them to motivate yourself. But decide from the onset that you will win no matter what. And hold YOURSELF accountable. Not the universe. If it is a crucial moment and you are in a dire predicament, financially, or health-wise, it is time to DEMAND the protection of the Shoten Zenjin. No prayer of a votary of the Lotus Sutra will go unanswered. If your prayer is going unanswered find out what it means to be a votary of the Lotus Sutra. And as you are chanting DEMAND the result that you want through your prayer. Awaken to your mission and realize that all your suffering is your opportunity to encourage other people. That is what is meant by turning Karma into Mission."

Enjoying Chicago in the days leading up to our presentation

Here i am with my dear friend Kate Randolph. 

We went out on an evening boat ride off of Navy Pier on Sunday with Aaron and Ben.